Perspective

This year's Valentine's Day had a rough start and by the end of the day had me saying "Worst. Valentine's. Ever!"  This entire week has been a difficult one for me. I woke up Sunday with a terrible cough.  It quickly progressed to body aches and chest congestion.  I stayed home from home Monday.. Tuesday and even Wednesday.  I decided to go into work on Thursday for one main reason, my husband told me that he had ordered a Valentine's present for me and had it delivered to my work.  He obviously was not thinking when he did that, knowing that I ALWAYS work from home on Thursdays.  He said by the time he realized his mistake, it was too late to change his order.  So Thursday morning I headed off to work.  By the time I arrived, I was already exhausted.  By 10am I had taken my second dose of TheraFlu and still was not seeing any relief from the coughing.  At noon I called the doctor and begged for an appointment, luckily they had a 3pm opening.  Since the doctor's office is down the street from work, that meant I had to somehow survive work until my 3pm appointment.  2:30pm came along and it was time for me to leave for my doctor's appointment.  One problem, my husband's gift had not arrived.  I text'd my husband and asked him if whatever he ordered would be okay at the office over the weekend.  He said that it wouldn't, and needed to be refrigerated in order to keep.  At this point I was frustrated.  Here I was at work, sick as a dog and miserable, and the only reason I was there was because my husband sent my present to my work address when he should have sent it to our house.  On my way out the door I popped my head into my boss's office and asked that he look out for the package and to just take care of it.  Somehow.  I honestly didn't care how!  It was 3pm and I made it to the doctor's office.  By this time I'm having a very difficult time breathing, almost gasping for air.  As I waited in the waiting room my cell phone rings.  I didn't recognize the number but had a feeling that I should answer it.  I had left a message at our dog's vet office so they were returning my call.  I explained to the vet the reason I was concerned about George W.  I had scheduled a dental cleaning for him in a few weeks, but noticed his gums looked abscessed around a few teeth.  The last few days after we put food in his bowl, he would pace the kitchen for about thirty minutes before he actually ate.  I felt like maybe he was in pain so was having a hard time eating.    She tells me that dogs will eat even when their gums are in pain.. that not eating might be a sign of nausea.  That the nausea might be a sign of his organs shutting down.  Umm what?  She says, I see that George W is 9 years old.. it's time to start preparing yourself to let him go.  I remember thinking, Whoa!  This conversation is going downhill.. and fast!  I said, I don't see signs of his organs shutting down, I mean he's still youthful!  She tells me a story of how she owned a golden retriever who's heart went out at the age of 8. I said, well he'll be in for his dental cleaning in a few weeks so we'll see what the blood work shows.  She tells me that a few weeks might be too late, that I need to get him in immediately.  If his organs are shutting down there isn't anything they could do, but I need to consider his quality of life.  I wanted to scream.  I remember thinking, this is not happening to me!  Next to my husband, my dog is my best friend!!  I can't have a baby, I'm so sick I wish I was dead and this woman is telling me my dog is dying?! WORST. VALENTINE'S. EVER!!

After my doctor's appointment I swing back by the office to pick up my gift.  I go straight home and make cupcakes for Jeremy's team.  Around 10pm I drive up to the gym where I see my husband for the  first time on Valentine's Day.  I finally get into bed around midnight.  I'm exhausted, broken and STILL coughing!

The next morning I log into my work computer from home.  I'm immediately greeted by an instant message from a friend.  She tells me about the phone call she received last night from her sister.  Yesterday her sister's husband was diagnosed with a tumor and it is terminal.  Her sister is a stay at home mom to two little boys and her husband probably had only a few months to live.  Perspective.  I may be temporarily miserable with this virus. I may not ever be able to have children and I may even soon lose my best friend, George W.  But I still had my husband.. and we are both healthy and happy.  I change my mind.  BEST. VALENTINE'S. EVER!!